Kushal Chordia, Chief Visibility Architect and OmniChannel Strategist at VaaS – Visibility as A Service.
We hire employees based on their past. We choose life partners based on the absence of one. And in both cases, we often ignore passion, growth and potential. Isn’t it time we redefined how we see humans—at work and at home?
In most boardrooms, experience is king. Job candidates are filtered, shortlisted and often eliminated based solely on whether their resume reflects years of relevant experience.
Now, contrast that with how we approach personal relationships, particularly in conservative or traditional settings. When evaluating a potential life partner, many families prefer someone who has no “history” at all. No exes, no past breakups, no emotional scars.
Same human. Two roles. Two vastly opposite standards. Why?
The Experience Paradox
In the workplace, we tend to treat experience as proof of competence and assume past roles indicate readiness for the future. We often reject talented, passionate individuals simply because they don’t have a list of prior jobs in a specific function or industry.
But at home, when it comes to relationships, experience is often treated as emotional baggage, and a “clean history” is rewarded—even if it means emotional immaturity or lack of real-life learning. Often, people with past relationships can be viewed with suspicion rather than wisdom.
It’s a paradox that I think reveals something deeper: Our obsession with past experience is less about logic and more about inherited bias.
But What About Passion?
Here’s what I see as quietly being killed by the experience-first culture: passion.
Too many HR departments, recruiters, founders and headhunters overlook the fire that drives real transformation. Passion can’t be measured on a resume. It doesn’t come with references. But it is the most sustainable driver of growth, creativity and loyalty.
You can train someone to use software. You cannot train someone to care. The best hires are not always those with the longest CVs. They’re the ones who:
• Ask questions that no one else thinks of.
• Stay curious long after onboarding ends.
•Treat the company’s mission like it’s their own.
And yet, these candidates are often ignored. Why? Because the applicant tracking system filtered them out for “lack of experience.”
We forget: Experience is what you’ve done. Passion is what you’re willing to do—again and again—even if you’ve never done it before.
The Emotional Duality Of Leadership
There’s another contradiction that deserves scrutiny: how we behave emotionally in different settings.
Many leaders are tough, cold and transactional at work yet gentle, kind and emotionally available at home.
They call this “professionalism.” But what I think it really can point to is emotional inconsistency—or worse, hypocrisy.
We don’t switch off our humanity when we enter an office. If anything, the people we lead at work need more empathy, not less. They’re dealing with pressure, self-doubt, financial stress and personal battles—just like we are.
Leadership isn’t about emotional distancing. It’s about emotional congruence. We can be firm and fair. Strong and soft. Driven and deeply human.
Who Can Lead This Change?
Culture doesn’t change from the bottom up. It shifts when the top decides to lead differently. The real torchbearers of this mindset shift must include:
• Founders and CXOs who create hiring standards and lead by example
• HR and talent leaders who can redefine what gets measured and prioritized
• Recruiters and headhunters who are the first gatekeepers of human potential
• Media and thought leaders who can normalize emotional intelligence and human-first cultures
• Educators who prepare the next generation to lead with EQ, not just IQ
The question every decision maker should ask is simple: Are we rejecting brilliance just because it doesn’t come with a history file?
Time For A Human Reset
Let’s build companies that hire for curiosity and commitment—not just checklists. Let’s raise families that celebrate emotional learning—not just sanitized personal histories. Let’s lead teams with empathy that is consistent—at home and at work.
Because in the end, we don’t just need better employees or partners; we need better humans.
Where We Go From Here
Imagine if your next hiring decision—or relationship decision—was based not on a list of past events but on real passion, purpose and potential. Human first. Role second. Passion above all. If that sounds radical, I believe it’s only because we’ve accepted the opposite for too long.
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