Minna Hu, Founder of AI Bookkeeper, committed to helping small business owners free up the time they spent on bookkeeping.
As a small business owner, life often feels like a relentless balancing act. Between running your business, managing family obligations and tending to the unexpected curveballs life throws your way, the chaos can feel all-consuming. It’s easy to fall into a state of overwhelm, where problems seem insurmountable, self-doubt creeps in and the weight of it all leaves you paralyzed.
But what if I told you things aren’t as dire as they seem? What if there’s a way to reset, refocus and move forward with clarity and resilience?
The 3Ps Of Overwhelm
Psychologist Martin Seligman, a pioneer in positive psychology, identified three common ways we explain negative events in our lives. He calls them the 3Ps, and they offer powerful insights into why we sometimes spiral when faced with challenges:
1. Personal: We blame ourselves for the problem, thinking, “This is my fault. I should’ve done better.”
2. Pervasive: We see the problem as infiltrating every aspect of our lives, believing it’s not just about one issue but a reflection of everything being out of control.
3. Permanent: We convince ourselves the problem will last forever, that there’s no light at the end of the tunnel.
When a challenge arises—especially one beyond our control—our tendency to view it through this lens can amplify our stress, making us feel trapped and overwhelmed. The good news is that by recognizing these patterns, we can take steps to break free.
A Personal Story Of Overwhelm
Like many of you, I wear multiple hats: I’m a small business owner and a mom of two. Not long ago, one of my key employees left the company. Suddenly, I found myself juggling the extra workload, scrambling to recruit and train a replacement, all while navigating a new business expansion that required securing bank loans. These challenges piled on top of my already full plate, and I started to unravel.
At first, I tried to push through. But I noticed the signs of burnout creeping in—I felt drained, I was procrastinating and I spent late nights escaping into YouTube instead of tackling my to-do list. My productivity plummeted, and I started to fall into the 3P trap.
• Personal: I told myself, “I shouldn’t be overwhelmed. I’ve done the self-development. I should know how to handle this. Feeling this way is a failure on my part.”
• Pervasive: The stress of hiring and onboarding a replacement seeped into everything. I felt stuck in decision-making, avoided tasks and began to believe that every part of my life was falling apart. Even small disruptions with my kids felt overwhelming, fueling a sense of chaos.
• Permanent: I convinced myself that this state of overwhelm was my new reality. I couldn’t see a way out. Every task felt urgent, and I worried I’d never regain the balance and focus I used to have.
From Overwhelmed To Resilient
The turning point came when I recognized my pattern of thinking problems as personal, pervasive and permanent and took three essential steps: accept, control, and progress.
1. Accept reality: The first step was acknowledging my feelings of overwhelm without turning to self-blame. I let go of the unrealistic expectation that I should be invincible or capable of handling everything on my plate. Challenges are inevitable, and feeling overwhelmed is a natural response—not a sign of failure. Recognizing this allowed me to be kinder to myself and focus on moving forward.
2. Focus on what I can control: Rather than trying to tackle everything at once, I narrowed my focus to what I could realistically manage. Each day, I asked myself, “What are three tasks that, if accomplished, will make today feel productive?” By dedicating my energy to completing those specific tasks, I avoided adding unnecessary pressure and reduced the burden on tomorrow’s workload.
For onboarding new employees, I concentrated on what I could influence: sharing the knowledge they needed, clearly explaining tasks and expectations and staying consistent in communication. I let go of unproductive worries, like whether they would meet my expectations or feel overwhelmed themselves. By honing in on what I could control, I began to feel calmer and more confident.
3. Make progress: Progress isn’t about fixing everything all at once; it’s about taking one step forward at a time. With each completed task or incremental step toward my goals, I reminded myself that I was making headway and that was enough. Small wins added up over time, and by steadily tackling manageable tasks, I started to feel less overwhelmed each day. By focusing on consistent, actionable steps and letting go of worry, I found I could make meaningful progress without becoming paralyzed by the big picture.
The Path To Resilience
Overwhelm doesn’t have to define us. As small business owners, we often face challenges that test our limits, but we’re also capable of incredible adaptability. When we recognize the 3Ps at play and intentionally shift our perspective, we can move from feeling stuck to feeling empowered.
So, the next time you find yourself on the brink, pause. Accept where you are, focus on what you can control and take one small step forward. Resilience isn’t about never feeling overwhelmed—it’s about learning to navigate the storm and come out stronger on the other side.
Your business, your family and your well-being are worth it.
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